Trust

At birth you are introduced to your mother, and father if your lucky. From that moment on you are constantly observing them and asking yourself why are they here. As a child you learn that your well being is your parents priority. When ever your hungry , uncomfortable, or in pain you seek for them so that you may receive proper attention. As you get older you may have a lot of question and your parents may withhold a lot information from you because you have not matured mentally, but eventually they will show you the way of the world through their perspectives. I am at the age where I appreciate the way in which I was raised. I have a love, and trust relationship with my parents even though i feel that I can withhold certain information from them. Lately I ask myself why do I withhold information? Why do I treat them unfairly? Their job is to make sure that I have a understanding on what is expected from me in life. So why am i not cooperating.

It is said that when you go to the doctors you are to be honest about everything. At first this seems odd since the doctor isn't a friend , or relative. In a matter of fact this person is a total stranger to you. The only difference is that his job is your well being. In order for him to properly diagnose/treat you he will need to know about your smoking habit, or history of unprotected sex. He is not a seer and he could only treat what he observes.

After focusing and analyzing my trust issues I have learned to apply them in a fair manner. I compare my introduction to my parents at birth to a first date with a potential girlfriend. I observe, and ask my self:
"Why is she here?"
"Does she need just sexual gratification?"
"Is she simply bored with nothing to do at home?"
" or could it be that she is interested in having a relationship with me?
At the same time I expect her to be thinking the same about me. The only difference between both introductions is that I am no longer a dependent, and incapable child. This should make life easier right? I mean I can express myself and give you an understanding of who I am and what I want.
In an ideal world we both should be able to express ourselves without withholding/ manipulating facts, or feelings. When I look at things from this perspective i feel betrayed when I'm lied to. I feel that this isn't going anywhere, and that i need to find someone who can genuinely express themselves.